Regretfully, Yours Truly

I want to reintroduce myself. I think it’s about time I do.

To be honest with you, reader, these past two years I’ve been grieving. You can read any of my past posts to figure out exactly what. But I’ve been crying. Constantly.

It wasn’t till recently, though, that I felt a shift. I don’t know if it’s age or small pieces of wisdom. But this shift feels so unlike anything I’ve ever felt, or experienced, or been offered. And it’s mine. And it’s new, but it feels good. It feels confident, rooted in the understanding that I hurt but I can also grow. I can also carry so much more than I ever expected, and that makes me feel whole. That makes me like myself.

My life is a chapter book. And I can feel a chapter ending. I’ve been here for three years. Since college.

My name is Melina. I believe in forgiveness, and so I forgive you, but please don’t come back.

My name is Melina. I let people talk and I watch them hang themselves with their own rope.

My name is Melina. I am very grateful for life. I am grateful to feel. Because there was a time I couldn’t feel anything at all. And really, that’s the whole point, right? Of life. Of our bodies and our minds and the universe. We are put here to feel everything and anything. To touch both the light and the dark, and be grateful that we lived enough and loved enough and lost enough to feel such a range of emotions. Sometimes I think we are the universe in human form, experiencing itself for the first time. Experiencing itself in every way it can’t outside of this Earth.

Walk with purpose.
Talk like you mean it.
Give grace.
And receive it.

The wheel always turns. Remember that.

Thank you.